This might seem like I'm complaining, and maybe a couple of weeks ago that would have been the case. But lately I've been learning to "be content whatever the circumstances" (Philippians 4:11). My circumstances are not quite as dire as Paul's when he wrote this letter to the church of Philippi, but I understand what it is to be in want. There are many things that I have wanted these past months and do not currently have. It is easy to look at the lives of my peers and to feel jealous of their situation in life, whether it's because they achieved the TFC dream (ring by spring, of course), because they got a job, or because they are seemingly "living it up." I'm not saying that I never struggle with jealously about those issues, but God has truly shown me how to be happy where I am. Earlier in the summer I sat around every day thinking about how awful my life was compared to Jane Doe's. I would stay up too late, get up too late, eat junk food, and sit in my room all day. Let me tell you from experience, that is no way to live. No wonder I was jealous of other people's lives; I wasn't doing anything to make my life better!
I've learned from my mistake, though. I want to live a life that is memorable. I don't want to wait to begin living until I have a job or a husband. There is so much living I can do now! I might not have a ton of money to work with, but money isn't everything. Today I met an old friend at the park and we had a blast just walking the trail and talking. Total cost? Zero dollars.
A couple of weeks ago I made that decision to keep living my life. And guess what? God reminded me that He's got my back. You're talking to one of Gwinnett County's newest substitute teachers. :] It might not be the most prestigious job in the world, but I'm learning to love the little bit of extra freedom I still get to enjoy through a part-time job.
If you're going through some of the same jealousy issues that I was (and still am some days), or if you just need some encouragement, take these verses to heart:
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.-Abby :]
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.